He wants to “give us a proper go” but.....

Little bit of back story 1st..... we’ve been on and off for the best part of a year, started out as fwb I then wanted more than more but he didn’t so we went separate ways. A few months go by and he gets in touch as he was in need of a friend and a place to stay for a while, while he sorted new living arrangements out. So he moves in and a couple of months go by and in that time we gradually went from just friends to fwb to being a couple (the L word was definitely floating about for both of us). Things take a sudden crash as he had to move in with his parents to look after his toddler while the mother was in hospital having another baby, she’d told him that it wasn’t his that it was someone else’s but then hits him with actually it is yours. He never wanted kids and she knew that and told him she wasn’t able to, their 1st was a complete surprise and Drs told her she’d never be able to have anymore and she does. Unsurprisingly he took it hard that this baby is suddenly his (dna was done) and he spiralled and told me it was over. He didn’t go back to her, he can’t stand her but he supports his kids and works his arse off to provide for them. Another couple of months go by and I get a text apologising for how he was towards me and that he just wasn’t able to cope with the bombshell and have a relationship at the same time. We start talking again and before we know it we’re back to being fwb and sort of casually dating.... well one night I’m out having drinks with my neighbours and he gets jealous cos I’m talking to a bloke and yet again vanishes on me!!! But a couple of weeks later he apologises and after a good talk we decide to give us a go, unfortunately he starts hanging out with one of his old mates and goes off the rails and decides he’s not ready for a relationship and needs to concentrate on his kids and work. Long back story I know lol I tell him he’s been an utter knob (in much harsher words) and that he’s hurt and messed me around for the last time. At this point you need to know that I have a bpd and feel emotions and situations to the enth degree, what may only be a small mole hill to me is a huge erupting volcano!!! After I’ve sent him a couple of weeks worth of pent up feelings, he finally tells me that because he was hanging about with this so called mate he’d managed to blow all of his savings and was embarrassed by the situation he’d put himself in and couldn’t face telling me. So now after a few weeks of talking and just hanging out with the occasional benefit, I told him that I wanted more and it was decision time. We could either just date exclusively and take it from there or stop altogether no more fwb. He managed to drag it out for a couple of weeks but decided that he wants to give us a proper go this time and no more messing about...... Now here’s where I don’t know if I’m being too sensitive etc or what, he said that he doesn’t do introducing to his parents as he finds it embarrassing and them embarrassing, it’s his daughter’s birthday party tomorrow and I’m not invited and he’s not really shared any information about it either. He won’t even introduce me to them but has no problem being around my kids!!! I feel like he’s ashamed of me, I wasn’t ready to meet his kids before as I didn’t want to get attached to them only for things to go pear shaped but I think we might actually get somewhere this time as we can’t walk away from each other. I just still feel like I’m completely separate from the rest of his life.. Am I just overreacting????? In relationships I go all in pretty much straight away and share everything so this is all new and strange to me!!! Someone please help sort my head out and give me your outsiders view of this via /r/relationship_advice https://ift.tt/3kio4vY