I'm not in a good headspace right now y'all. I am not ok. Feel free to look at my post history if you want some background on my JUSTNOMIL.I have been backed into a corner and I feel like my marriage might break in half. This is more of a vent but advice/constructive criticism is ALWAYS welcome.DH's parents bought us tickets to travel to see them for Christmas.I do not want to go. We spent (quite literally) 3 full evenings arguing about all of the reasons for which I DO NOT WANT TO DO THIS. I am not ok.Let's leave aside all the interpersonal relationship issues for a moment. I do not want to fly with my children in the middle of a pandemic and flu season because my DH misses his family and hasn't spent Christmas day with them in 7 years (they live across the country). I don't understand why is HAS to be THIS Christmas. (We've spent time on either side of the holiday with them during those years and always Skype present opening with the kids. We have just not spent Christmas specifically with them for a number of reasons, usually financial/trave/time constraints.)I haven't slept. I've been crying for two days.I am aware that I do not have to get on that plane. I am also aware that not doing so will more than likely result in the dissolution of my marriage.3 days. 3 days of presenting all the reasons I am not ok with this. Telling DH that I've been painted into a corner and I'm NOT OK with this. I do not trust that staying home will not cause a massive amount of resentment from him to hold over me in our marriage. And still...no amount of reasoning (logical or emotional) or anxiety or panic was enough for him to put the NECESSITY to go RIGHT NOW THIS YEAR to the side. I was/am more than willing to plan for something in the spring or summer we could drive to so that he could spend time with them.But no. I lose. Manipulative, controlling JUSTNOMIL has played this out perfectly and my DH just went along with it. Now, I'm the monster that isn't willing to let my issues go to the wayside so he can spend Christmas with his family and have fun. They are the saviors that dropped thousands so we could fly out there at the last minute. (Mind you THEY won't travel, nor will his siblings due to COVID, but our family can be cannon fodder/test monkeys.) Oh and MIL told all of his siblings we were coming prior to ever booking tickets/DH saying yes.And I think my relationship might be really broken.Therapy isn't until next week. So yeah. I don't know what to do. Thanks for reading. via /r/JUSTNOMIL https://ift.tt/358hXE6
No comments:
Post a Comment