DAE not remember big chunks of their childhood?

I’m slowly coming to the conclusion that I need to either go LC/NC with my parents and it feels like my world is starting to fold in on itself. I sent a request in for a therapist, but I have to wait for them to process my papers (I can be a little too impatient sometimes lol.) I feel like I’m crazy because I don’t have any good memories about my family/school/life from probably first grade to late middle school.I’m starting to think that maybe I was emotionally abused by my parents as a child, because people always praised me for acting like an adult but somehow never noticing that I didn’t have a good family life. I remember being jealous of the other kids because it always seemed like their parents never treated them like they were someone to rant to about their spouse, and I still don’t really feel like my parents ever loved me. My parents used to beat me and call me names whenever I did something they thought was bad (like that time my dad told me the only things that would ever love me were the family pets because I got a bad report card) but it all mysteriously stopped when I threatened to report them to CPS. I was nine. I remember spending a lot of time soothing myself because I never felt like I could talk to my parents about anything. It’s all little things like these that make me feel like garbage as an adult, and somehow like I’m wasting time because I know I need help but everyone had bad moments in their childhood right? Does everyone feel like it’s an insult when their parents get them something/post something that’s supposed to be praising them for being a good child, but you don’t remember hearing it as a kid?It all kinda came apart one day because I realized my sister is doing the same nasty things to my niece and i decided it all has to stop somewhere. It’s gonna be shitty and it’s gonna be painful but I’m gonna make it stop. I apologize because my posts make no sense right now, but I feel like my head is stuck in a blender. Any advice is 100% welcome. via /r/JustNoTalk https://ift.tt/2RWCFkc