The end of an era

It’s going to be a bumpy ride. Mods delete if need be Trigger warning: ABUSE, swearing DO NOT SHARE.So I made a post about my shitty MIL before. And to be honest this is more or less a vent because I’m trying to keep it together for DH.As I stated before DH is one of eight. He is only close to the twins who are younger than him. Through out our almost close to 20 year friendship I have learned some tragic heartbreaking shit. His dad and mother split up and divorced his dad took the twins and left DH. After his dad left he was obviously upset. His two older brothers weren’t living at home so his egg donor enrolled him in big brother big sister. Which I’m sure given the trigger warning you know where this is going. After he was in that he started to lash out and his grades suffered. His egg donor put him into a different program one more like ROTC. But for tweens and teens. DH encountered his abuser. In the same fucking program. His abuser went from big brother big sister to Boy Scouts to this other program. From the age of 7 to 14 he suffered. Eventually the abuser was caught, arrested, tried, incarcerated and due to the wonderful state we’re from this asshole only got 10 years. 10 fucking years. Countless children’s lives changed forever because of this asshole. His siblings suffered by a different hand. Bear with me we’re getting to the JN part.Recently we went to visit our home town (safely) for a food tour. While we were there it was DHs birthday. He’s been NC for awhile, but because family he decided to reach out to egg donor. It’s awkward and tense and her house is a complete shit hole. We go to visit his sister (one of the twins)and we take her out to dinner. During this she drops a bombshell “you realize that egg donor knew about everything going on with all of us right”.... he physically deflates. He denies it she couldn’t possibly do that she’s their mom. JYSIL goes on to explain how yeah she knew which I agree yeah the bitch knew. When we get home DH is distant and I check on him but he says he needs space.Over the next week he spirals. He drinks more he’s more on edge. Until Friday. Friday was tough he has a total meltdown and finally admits that yeah it’s possible egg donor knew. He agrees to go to counseling and I’m on the hunt. Friday night I’m playing a video game and he comes into my office timidly. Now DH is 6’4” beefy. Not normally super emotional let alone timid. He says that he needs to know for sure he needs proof that egg donor knew, he asks for me to call JYSIL so I call JYSIL and she confirms everything, how one sister told egg donor that egg donors boyfriend was molesting her and the twins, how the boyfriend would chase them around when they got out of the shower saying he’s going to bite their butts. While his fucking mother sat there and watched, drinking her shitty beer. How this dick would search all of their rooms and would shame DH when he made mentioned what was happening to him. That all of the remaining kids in the house put deadbolts on the inside of the door so they could lock them when they slept. When DH was in big brother big sister he’s grades starting slipping, the fun loving boy now was withdrawn and distant, he’s having his sisters hit him and bruise him, DH isn’t showering. Hiding clothing, Blaring red flags. I knew it was bad just never knew it was this bad. DH knows I talked to her since he asked, I told him I won’t say anything unless he wants to know. He goes gets the pizza smokes a cigarette and sits down and asks, I tell him everything SIL said. He admits he had a feeling she knew but didn’t want to accept that his mom would put him or the others through all of that. DH talks and I listen. He’s a broken shell of a man at this point and basically says he needs extra love right now and my dad being amazing takes him out and about Saturday.Saturday night he comes home and says, I’m going to hike this extremely popular trail for a week. He says that he’s going to do this but right before he gets on this trail he’s going to call and confront egg donor and sperm donor. Basically say they’re never going to hear from him again that he knows they know and that they’re shit parents. He’s blocking them after this pivotal phone call and changing his number. He’s been through so much from such a young age. He’s gone through victim shaming from egg donor, drunken badgering phone calls, begging for money, demanding money, neglect, heartbreak, disappointment, betrayal just to name a few and still before we went to visit he held out hope that they had changed. via /r/JUSTNOMIL https://ift.tt/3kf3ZGZ